Christmas Gone Wrong

When opening your presents please beware

Whether naughty or nice you’re in for a scare

Because the toys inside have completely lost their mind

They’ll pull your hair, scratch your face and be anything but kind

So run for the hills, run for your lives

It’s the only way you’re going to survive

Take it from me, it’s time to go flee

Before you get sucked into the Christmas tree.

The Great Northwest

Trucking through, checking in, cherry pies & dim-lit motor inns.

Crowded pines, lumber yards, whisky beards & crummy cars.

Teeter-totter, skookum snoose, alpine lakes & hunting moose.