Creative Director Moonlighting as Password Security

Please create a new password for your account.

Password123

You’ve used this before. We’re looking for something fresh.

Password123!

Your password is too similar to your previous idea.

Letme1n

This still feels pretty first thought. Keep going…

dingDong!

Try exploring some other ways in. Go back to the brief: min 8 characters, at least one number and symbol.

Kn0ckKn0ck

Feel like I’ve seen it before.

Psst!

Yeah, no. What would David Droga do?

An app that scans your retina for identification and manages to donate to charity at the same time.

Great. But we’re only looking for a password word at this stage. We could look at this down the track.

fhgjfldjfdK01

Random. What’s the human truth behind the idea? I don’t get it.

pa$$word123

You’re not there yet. There’s something in the dollar signs for sure. Can we see what this would look like in all CAPS? 

PA$$WORD123

Why did you change it to all CAPS? There’s no way I would have suggested that.

Helloisitmeyourelookingofor?

Cheesy.

pastw0rdS

Puns are the lowest form of wit.

thereisnopassw0rD

Clever. A little long. Not sure if it’s memorable.

catsR2cool!
Really? Cats have been done to death.  Come on, I know you can crack this.

cre8ivitySux!

Hmm. Is there something that ties to culture or a newsworthy cause?

Loveislove1

Feels a bit tokenistic. What about something so simple no one would ever guess it. Like: Password123! 

Donald Trump Targaryen?

Donald Trump has set the internet on fire with fan theories that he may actually be a Targaryen with fire breathing dragons, after threatening North Korea with ‘fire and fury’.

‘North Korea best not make any more threats to the United States. They will be met with fire and fury like the world has never seen,’ President Trump said during a briefing.
Fan theories were quick to draw comparisons between the President and rightful ruler of the Seven Kingdoms, Daenerys Targaryen, such as: ambition, ego, impatience, recklessness and generally ignoring their more experienced advisors.

However, there appears to be just as much dissimilarity between the two, namely: empathy, likeability and regular sized hands. Not to mention––breaker of chains and good looks.

In fact, it would appear the President has more in common with Daenerys’ father, ‘The Mad King.’ Could Trump perhaps be a long lost secret uncle we didn’t know about?

Come to think of it, he does resemble a weird/sleazy uncle who says inappropriate things at the dinner table.

Pokémon Goes Out of Control

Remember when we’d stalk the streets and pile into parks searching for Pokèmon? When the cops would ask you what you were doing hanging around outside a stranger’s home at midnight and you could explain that you were just on a quest? Or when a slim chance of catching a Vaporeons was worth stopping traffic and risking your life for? Good times.

But as popularity for the app wanes, Pokèmon have gone from being the most hunted species on the planet, to a damn nuisance. They’re fucking everywhere. The last remnant of sad Pokèmon master trainers are said to be outnumbered 7000-1.

Parks (‘GYMS’) have become breeding grounds, and our streets are at risk of being overrun by these pests once thought cute and fun. And now our native wildlife are suffering. Poor street rats are being forced out of their natural habitats behind Chinese restaurants. Not to mention, the damage being done to our property. Just recently, a car in Brooklyn was set a blaze by a rampant Charizard.

But it doesn’t end there. While walking my dog this morning, I happened to step right in Pokèmon poop. Sure, it may be invisible to the naked eye, but it’s safe to say it was probably there. I mean, let’s face it, based on the sheer numbers of Pokèmon roaming around, we’ve probably all stepped in their shit. Go on, check your shoe.

My question is: how long before a mother claims that a Diglett took my baby?  What we must do is simple. We need to dust off those cobwebs from our Pokèmon Go app (or re-download it in most cases) and take action! But this time, we gotta catch and kill ’em all.

 

 

 

Squash the Internet

Australian internet provider Optus have received thousands of calls over the last few days from customers complaining of a ‘broken internet’. Tech support lines have been jammed from Sydney to Mumbai since images of Kim Kardashian’s oily backside went viral last week.

A representative from Optus was forced to comment earlier today. ‘Checking out Kim Kardashian’s booty is not the reason your internet is broken.’ He paused. ‘It may just be a loose cable.’

Despite his refusal to blame the image for breaking the internet, he did admit that a ‘booty’ may cause, at least, some damage. ‘It is possible that the internet could be squashed by an image of somebody’s rear end; but in my opinion, it would need to be substantially bigger, and not as curvaceous.’